Dear America

Dear America,

I am deeply sorry I am not rejoicing with you over the loss of human life. I understand and condone the fact that Osama Bin Laden had to be exterminated, but I see no reason for huge parties celebrating the death of a man. If that makes me a terrorist, FINE.

Love,

Corinne

Love Yourself, Goddammit

I'm negative. I've always been negative, I probably always will be. While people were rejoicing over the death of Osama Bin Laden, I was the one standing in the corner, arms crossed, shaking my head and saying stuff like "He was a human being too" and "You're rallying together over death?"

I'm no good at patriotism. But tangent aside, a friend showed me this website, galadarling.com, that had 50 Ways to Put the Light Back In Your Heart, and I loved it. http://galadarling.com/article/50-ways-to-put-the-light-back-in-your-heart

So I figured I might as well write something having to do with that. Here goes.

Love yourself, goddammit. Watch Doctor Who and squish yourself real far back into the couch when the Silent come onscreen. Make coffee in the middle of the day and drink it out of a tiny mug. Refill that stupid mug twenty times and don't give it a second thought. Pet a cat. Stay in constant correspondence with someone you barely know for three days. Start a blog and then don't write on it for three weeks. Dance in the godforsaken, neverending rain. Draw something really horrible and hang it on the wall. Eat ice cream with weird stuff in it. Blast your favorite music. Dye your hair. Listen to stoners talk about their frightening childhoods (wait, no, don't do that by choice, it's scary and kinda gross). Pretend to fly. Fall in love really fast. Write really long text messages. Read a book for fun. Wear your favorite outfit. Talk with someone you don't see often face to face. Buy practical frivolities. Study (sorry, that's a note to myself). Sing Avenue Q loudly when the mood strikes. Stand up for yourself. Fantasize about summer. Go on a date with someone just because. Brush up on girl code (because apparently it's really important). Plan the perfect day, then do it. Drink freaky flavors of lemonade. Write a shitty book. Put up with crap with a smile. Take a really long shower. Have a nap. Cuddle something you love.

Because you deserve it. Have a happy week, y'all.

Monday Love Letters (on an undetermined day that I think is actually Tuesday)

Okay... late again, I know, I'm sorry, but I'm on break so the days of the week no longer matter much to me.

Music

So I went to go see a one-night showing of Avenue Q with my dad and bought the CD (for those of you who aren't familiar with the show, it's basically a really dirty Sesame Street) . Kinda obsessed with it now... songs I recommend are The More You Ruv Someone, There's a Fine Fine Line, The Internet is for Porn (warning: Not for little monsters), and Schadenfreude (also a little mature). I'm also currently obsessed with Chameleon Circuit's self-titled album (songs about Doctor Who. I know, I'm a nerd). I recommend K-9's Lament, Type 40, and Blink (links below)

Other Lovely Stuff

Doctor Who: End of Time parts 1 and 2: I cry every single freaking time. But the sixth season is starting at the end of this month! *nerdy glee*

Mockingjay: Yeah, I'm finally getting around to reading it... and it's pretty good. I mean, I loved Hunger Games as a stand-alone book, but I give props to Suzanne Collins for writing two wonderful sequels. If only Katniss wasn't so difficult...

Novel Style T-shirts: I want this one.

And this one.

And this one.

As well as basically everything on http://www.outofprintclothing.com/. Anyone want to get me an extremely late birthday present?

Mismatched patterns and shitty flip-flops: It's getting warmer here and I've taken to throwing on random, stripy tanktops, my argyle jacket, and the crappy Goodwill flip-flops I got last summer. Transformation into college fratboy: 15% complete

Links!

The More You Ruv Someone: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gIbiKkhwXtk

There's a Fine Fine Line: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PTFI9sQdpGo

The Internet is for Porn: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NiFD6EFVsTg

Schadenfreude: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nCQGQ5qBQTA

K-9's Lament: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cCyZu_lsaiM

Type 40: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VOkIyKJWSQ

Blink: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=G1aZz9Bf_eY

The Magic of New Hoodies

I am not trendy. Not even close, really. My idea of a "cute outfit" involves half-clean jeans and an ironic t-shirt. Which is why one of my favorite objects of clothing has to be the hoodie.

Nerds and emo kids alike have gathered around this magical not-a-jacket-not-a-sweater for thousands (well, dozens) of years now, and I figured someone should give it some credit (also, I do own the above hoodie... because I'm a nerd)

Dear Hoodies,

Thanks for being the laziest piece of clothing for so long without asking anything in return. Thanks for letting us throw you on at a moment's notice when we're running late and it's three below outside. Thanks for protecting our other clothes from rogue spaghetti sauce and salad dressing. Thanks for another way to express our geekiness. And thanks for that soft, unwashed new hoodie fuzz that I wish every surface in the world was made of.

Love,

Corinne

Monday Love Letters (wait, it's Monday already?!)

So today I thought I'd talk about... wait... is it Monday? Shit! Um... so this is a seriously impromptu Monday Love Letter. Enjoy or something.

Music

So I'm rediscovering Ludo's Prepare the Preparations album. Favorites include Whipped Cream, Overdone, and I'll Never Be Lonely Again. Also... um, I'm listening to this song called Inside Out by Eve 6 and it's pretty good.

Other Lovely Things

Broccoli: Okay, I know that's kinda weird, but I really really love broccoli. It makes me feel like a dinosaur eating hapless little trees.

Wiping my mouth with Justin Bieber's face: So my sister had a birthday party and they had a ton of plates and stuff depicting the ugly mug of Biebs himself. Fastforward a day, and the only napkins we have are those of Bieber. There is very little as satisfying as drawing a little mustache and then smearing spaghetti sauce on his face (because I am five years old)

Half-finished Mountain Dews: You didn't make a commitment, you don't have to finish it. Kinda liberating.

Being on your own for the weekend and doing whatever you want: Even if all you do is wander and eat chips and drag your friends to writing workshops and find out what your Laban formula is (slow+light+indirect= float).

Fantastic Webcomics: I recommend Hanna is Not a Boy's Name (http://www.hanna.aftertorque.com/), The Meek (http://www.meekcomic.com/), String Theory (http://www.stringtheorycomic.com/), and Lackadaisy Cats (http://www.lackadaisycats.com/). All are amazing, and great if you're bored and want to look at some amazing art. Links!

I'll Never Be Lonely Again: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oFM73t1pcNM

Overdone: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sn-kBXqVKzw&feature=related

Whipped Cream: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eV7fAbBVhd0&feature=related

Enjoy!

Thoughts from Places: Things the State Thespian Conference Taught Me

I go away a lot. Is it because I like to leave? Maybe. But I learn things from the places I go. So, without further ado... stuff I learned from the State Thespian Conference (alternately titled Six Hundred Theater Kids Running Around in Animal Hats and Moshing) 1. Put a couple hundred kids in a with a bit of space, turn on some music, and you can have an instant moshpit. 2. After several years of intense study, the truth is revealed: You can actually dislike your own friends. 3. The amount of money people are willing to pay for the most trivial of things is astounding. 4. Like Mountain Dew, for example (I think I bought four on the trip and didn't finish any of them) 5. Sherlock Holmes is potentially the best book series I've ever read (and not just because Holmes shoots cocaine on the first page of Sign of Four) 6. Sleeping in one position for the whole night is difficult. 7. I really missed toast and jelly. 8. There are a lot of seriously hot theater guys (especially shirtless ones)(I'm so shallow) Need an explanation? Too bad. Tell me about things you learn from other places!

Monday Love Letters... on Tuesday

Sorry for the lateness, doing three shows right now (in addition to live-sucking novelling and homework)(in that order) so let's get started.

Music

Loving The Calculation, Chemo Limo, and Blue Lips by Regina Spektor, as well as an old favorite, Merry Happy (Kate Nash), and both Cigarette and Fred Jones Part 2 by Ben Folds. Links at bottom, probably.

Other Lovely Stuff

Hamlet:

If I lived in the seventeenth century, I probably would have been that chick stalking Shakespeare. I love the guy, and read Hamlet last year in preparation for Tennant's movie (yeah, I'm obsessed) and just adored the tortured character of Hamlet. I probably shouldn't tell you how many lines of the To Be or Not To Be soliloquy I have memorized...

Speaking of which: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=39nDRgMxSSA It's beautiful.

Sub-catagory: Shakespeare's bromances! There are so many... Mercutio and Romeo, Hamlet and Horatio, Rozencratz and Guildenstern, Brutus and Cassius, Caesar and Antony... I could go on for hours.

BBC's Bedtime Stories for Kids: Found these while watching interviews... they're not only done by David Tennant, but by John Barrowman and John Simm too! Needless to say, I was nerdily thrilled.

Here's one of Ten's: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch It's so cute... *is slapped for Tennant fangirliness*

Sherlock Holmes:

Got the collection for my birthday. I adore the characters of Holmes and Watson and the mysteries are just so amazing. And I can't say I don't love the movie too...

These little chocolate mint things my friend Alyssa gifted us with: They were probably the only good old-lady candy I've ever had.

Links!

The Calculation: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=2DLp-vE3AKg&feature=related

Blue Lips: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=oqQXJ16mzrk&feature=related

Chemo Limo: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_NF0QcIn9I&NR=1

Merry Happy: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qf4Ea59Uods

Cigarette: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=AJye3_Edjmo

Fred Jones Part 2: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=JzvgVjRJ9IM

Novelling: Fun for Masochists

Dear Reader (hey, I'm writing a letter to you for once. How 'bout that),
I'm a lit buff. I love Orwell, Doyle, Dickinson, Salinger, Green, and Bill Shakespeare himself. I read good books like some people have sex: voraciously, passionately, and often. But there is one wordcraft I find myself losing sleep over more often than not, and that is novelling.
So let's say you're me and you're in sixth grade and you fancy yourself the lovechild of Douglass Adams and Harper Lee and you decide that you're going to write a book.
A science fiction book.
About dystopian societies and mutated children and addictions and torture.
Because after all you ARE a literary prodigy and you CAN pull off a completely different, completely screwed-over world at age twelve.
Fast-forward four years. You're still slaving over this goddamn, untitled "book". If an outsider looked at your Google history, they would call the police. You know more things about drugs and alcohol abuse than most adults. Your vocabulary is pitted with profanity from writing it for years and you daydream about the same two characters, both of which aged along with you and became more and more sullied with time.
You really, really want to slap your twelve-year-old self for tying you to this heap of shit you used to call your "Great American Novel". You haven't learned anything except how strip a car and cure a hangover (and you don't even drink). Your life has become one continual spiral of rewrites and plot holes.
I know you're thinking "But Corinne! Why don't you just give up the stupid thing?"
But I can't. Buried deep under all that animosity and hatred I feel for my novel, a tiny spark of the love and discovery I first felt for the idea still lingers. Stupid spark, not letting me enjoy the remainder of my life.
But anyway, my dear Reader, if you ever want to "make a difference" and write a novel, DON'T. You'll thank me later.
Love,
Corinne

P.S. I've also written two other novels (for NaNoWriMo, check it out (www.nanowrimo.com)) and they didn't give me nearly as much grief... maybe because I did them in a month each and then tucked them away into folders.
P.P.S. If you really MUST write (or die), write some stupid fluff about a "normal" high school girl who falls in love with a hot monster. I hear publishers are loving those now.
P.P.P.S. Sorry for all the rants. I'm just passionate lately.

RANT OF ANGER

Dear Homophobes (inlcuding all you dumbass twelve-year-olds who're so 'well-versed in varying sexualities'),
Today, my little sister was conversing with a girl with whom she is doing a play. The other girl brought up the sexuality of the director and commented on it as 'weird'. My sister (God love her), defended the director, stating that he couldn't help what he was born with. The other girl then commented "He could change."
Do you see what you're doing to our youth? My God, I really hate you people. Saying that about any other group could be considered a negative hasty generalization, but with homophobes I think I'm entitled.
There are some kind, beautiful gay, lesbian, bisexual, and transgender people out there, some of which I happen to know and love. And if you want to predispose yourself against them... you may be one. Just a thought.
Love,
Corinne

Readers: Sorry for all the rants. I'm just rarely pleased with the opinions of the jackanapes I call my peers. If you hate rants, tell me. Though I probably won't stop... so maybe you should keep your hatred to yourself.

For the Love of David Tennant...

It had to happen at some point. Even as easy it is to conceal one's inner feelings on the Internet, I can no longer hold my passion in much longer...




I am in love with David Tennant.





*silence*




I know I just lost half of you in a flurry of angry shoes and disappointed sighs. "She's one of those!" you say. "A pathetic fangirl with a cardboard cutout in her bedroom!"


Sadly, this is true. I am a fangirl. And I'm goddamn proud.



Why should we be afraid to express our nerdiness? Why should we be afraid of loving random Scottish actors who are twenty-four years our senior? Why shouldn't we profess our love in career-following and merch-purchasing?



I'm tangenting, but the truth is this: Love isn't love. Love is so much more than the cookiecutter Dictionary.com definition we label it with. Love isn't just gazing into your boyfriend's eyes at the lunch table, or laughing over dirty jokes with your friends. Love can also be for people you've never met, and will never meet. Love can be watching someone and thinking "Wow. I can connect with this person even though he'll never know me."



That's why I think nerdy actor (and actress) love is so great. It gives people a chance to exercise the love the world has forced away. The love of the characters someone plays and the cadence of their voice and the stupid phrases screenwriters put in their mouths. The sub-love.




So, Reader, if you love someone deplorably nerdy, don't hide it all away. Have a lovely weekend and indulge in the sub-love!



Disclaimer: For those of you who don't know, David Tennant played the Doctor in Doctor Who, Hamlet in Hamlet, and Katurian in The Pillowman (which I don't recommend for children under the age of thirty due to child murder and language)(but mostly child murder) I also do not condone stalking and other freaky behaviors towards your sub-love. Also, he was a gift...

In Defense of the Rats

What does the word "rat" bring to mind? Foot-long, plague-infested beasts with jaws slippery with blood? Mangled black fur and worm-like tails?

How about this:

Not what you were expecting, right?

Ever since the fallacy that is the Black Plague, society has constantly pounded a very biased idea into our primative heads: Rats bad. We've been told that they're rodents and thus live in garbage, eat human babies, and carry fleas the size of Great Danes.

Rats are unconventional, rats are vermin that do not follow the law, in any animated movie about mice, rats are the bad guys!

As a piece of unconventional vermin myself, over time I've taken a liking to rats. I mean, when I was a kid and society's words were still fresh in my mind, I wasn't quite so keen on the idea of rodents. All tail-y and stuff. But they grew on me.

Long string of tangents coming up, I think. But anyway, my own personal experiences with rats. Nimh, pictured above, is a five-month-old blonde purebreed dumbo rat. I got her after months of clandestine pleading, and finally achieved Rat Domination in my household. So many people believe that hamsters, gerbils, or even rabbits make better rodential (I made that up) pets than rats do because they "don't bite, aren't messy, and are very social."

Bullshit. Ever been scratched by a pet rabbit because you tried to hold it? I still have scars. But I've known my rats to lick my fingers and click their teeth to say hello. No violence involved.

Okay, so I suck at being persuasive. But just to leave you with a thought: Sometimes stereotyping isn't always true, for both animals and people. Be open-minded and don't close off to new ideas. Poorly written rant over. Now look at that face!

Note: Do not let your rat run pell-mell all over your bed while you try to take pictures of her. She will pee on your keyboard and you will not realize it until you start typing.

Monday Love Letters

So the brilliant artist and blogger San Smith (http://www.san-smith.com/) has done Love Letters to some of her favorite things of the week, and as I loved the idea (and true writers steal), I've decided to write a weekly love letter as well. It's on Monday because I hate Mondays (as does the rest of the working/school world) and these letters will give me something to look forward to (damn, another prepostion)

Music

Currently I'm loving Regina Spektor's Folding Chairs (links below) as well as Oedipus as mentioned in the previous post (the link thing takes an age because apparently this thing won't let me copy and paste, so just youtube it.) I'm also in love with Ludo's Roxy and the ENTIRE FREAKING SOUNDTRACK of Avenue Q.

Other Lovely Stuff

Girl Scout Trefoils with Milk: Oh my God... they make me feel like a gleeful little kid running home after school, even if I'm eating them at midnight while reading trashy nonfiction and horrible reviews of Red Riding Hood.

Horrible Reviews of Red Riding Hood:

Dear Director,

All that Twilight werewolf shit? It's been done shittily before. Also, using a chick from Mean Girls as your lead? Now all I can think of whenever I see the trailer is "My breasts can always tell when it's going to rain."

Love,

Corinne

Sour Lemonade: So much better than sweet.

Finding an old jacket you used to hate but now find is the exact thing you need to complete your outfit: Hell yes!

Having your cat sit on your pillow and breathe in your face until you get out of bed: He's all "Screw alarm clocks, bitch!"

Hopefully pictures next time when I'm actually feeling work-y. Also, I know I posted this Tuesday, but in truth, I was writing it yesterday so it still counts. So there.

Links!

Folding Chairs: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=uCvgXmg0m1g&feature=related

Oedipus: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=MSfSR4Pj1EE&feature=related

Roxy: http://http//www.youtube.com/watch?v=d6O46_NHxxI&feature=related

Oedipus vs. Ke$ha

I'm an oldies and obscure music fiend. Marina and the Diamonds, Ludo, Elizabeth and the Catapult, Ben Folds (who isn't really that obscure... but I love him), Regina Spektor (her song Oedipus has been playing on repeat for three hours), MIKA, anyone who takes a little digging to find, as well as the Beatles, Simon and Garfunkel, Lionel Richie, and Led Zeppelin. But I draw the line at the music of NOW.
I may sound like a prude, but having the future leaders of the world (AKA our delusional youth)(Sorry kids) listen to music in which Ke-dollar sign-ha eats her boyfriends and partakes in binge drinking doesn't really sound like a good plan. Currently I've been wondering what happened to quality music that didn't involve drunken blackout sex and Katy Perry wanting to see (pea)cocks.
But anyway, letters. I've actually written Ke$ha a couple letters on my old letter-writing medium, Facebook, one pertaining to her destruction of her New Year's Resolution (not to be a douchebag) just by saying it on national television, and the other pertaining to the repugnant song Cannibal my lovely friend Devon obligated me to listen to (wait... shit, is to a preposition? I can't end a sentence that long on a preposition! Screw it, I'm not well read enough to correct it)
But anyway, I thought I'd put my two Ke$ha letters on here as a kind of peek into my previous letters. And if you're a Ke$ha fan... sorry, I guess.

Letter #1:
Ke$ha,
I could bitch about your failed New Year's Resolution, but then again, I said I was going to eat healthier while eating a burger, so I guess we're all just hypocrites. You continue to be a douchebag and I'll eat my fries and we'll pretend to try again next year.
Cordially,
Corinne
P.S. I still don't like you. No hard feelings.




Letter #2:
Dear Ke$ha,
I didn't think anyone could possibly besmirch the name of Jeffrey Dahmer any further than he already has... congratulations, you proved me wrong.
Corinne
P.S. Good for you, teaching our future leaders their serial killers. Your mother must be so proud.


Disclaimer: If you know any good music of NOW, tell me! I'm always on the lookout! Also, I don't condone Jeffrey Dahmer's cannabalistic and necrophilic actions. Just making sure we were clear.

Who Needs Letters?

I write letters. Tiny, three sentence letters to people who will hopefully never read them. I wasn't very clear on that in my introductory post, and I apologize if you were expecting me to hipster-angst about Starbucks' new logo or something of that nature. Your money will be refunded at the door.
But anyway, back to letters. I love them, both the typeface alphabet and the actual paragraph-beginning-with-Dear-Soandso. I love the simplicity of handwritten text and the musk of good paper. I love crisp neat lines and swirly signatures.
Maybe I should have been born in the 50s... because now messages are quick, scrawled out on keyboards without the promise of that sweet paper smell at all. And while I also adore this two dimensional wonderland we call the Internet, my desire for more letters is agonizing.
Thus, a reason. I write letters because I want to connect to the people I'll never send them too. I want to insult them, change them, advise them, and help them without ever doing a thing.
Picture gotten? Okay.

I've actually been meaning to write a short letter to Japan for a day or so. They've been through a ton these past few days and I've been sending all the good thoughts and karma I can. So here's to you, Japan.

Dear Japan,
I'm really impressed by you guys. My country is going crazy over the earthquake and resulting tsunami and resulting potential nuclear meltdown and you all have handled this disaster in a calm fashion that the rest of the world should learn from. I am contributing to relief efforts and wish you the best of luck.
Corinne

God that was difficult.

One Small Step for Man...

Hi there, Reader. Welcome to my life.

Well, unless you Google me and come to the conclusion that I live in Burbsville, Midwest, and then move to my hometown and forcibly inject yourself into my social group, you won't actually be a part of my life. Instead, you'll be the life observer I always wanted to be.
I hope that's okay.
But on to business: this is a (mostly) factual account of this twisted rollercoaster Reality through the glassy eyes of the observer. Stupidity will be documented, injustice will be committed, strongly worded letters will be written to strangers, and lots of shitty coffee will be consumed.
Let's go.